Episode 320
Audio: There was a drip… and incessant drip as the British weather decided to go from trying to cook us to trying to drown us. I have removed as much as possible but sadly some signs remain.
With Granny hit with the Whammy, its time to Tidy up the knick knacks and set some demon traps up. The plans neonates come up with!
With the Gluttony demons devouring their way through half of Readings Takeaway, and most of the Homeless population having left they are getting desperate. How will the Neonates capitalise on this. Continue reading →
Today we celebrate the Podcast’s 7th Birthday, and we Celebrate in style with a bit of SLA Industries (using FATE because Mawdrigen didn’t have time to relearn the system!)
Join us in the World of Progress as 3 313 Stormers get to grips with a RED BPN deep in Cannibal sector three.
We finally get chance to get back to the Vampires of Reading, and find them with a sticky demon problem and a lot of vague ideas of how to deal with it. so they go and visit yet another dodgy contact, in the form of the mysterious Madame Cinder…
It’s all gone wrong in the Indonesian Archipelago as the naturalists continue trying to survive until the boat comes back, without water (other than the islands) and with Very little food. Can they manage to stave off the strange island creatures, and prevent thmselves from going mad with the influence of whatever is in the water?
The Dindroff-Menscher – Bakersfield expedition is continueing in the Indonesian Archipelago, but it seems as if it is being plagued by problems. Giant boars and people turning to dust are not normal to most expeditions, but it seems like they are for this one!
Can they survive the flora, the fauna, and each other?
When Mawdrigen Finally works out what session it is this is Episode 309, wherein we play Cthulhu Dark, and join our two Theatrical Workers on the set of the Latest Pendelbury production.
Having lost his previous cast to some kind of rumoured accident, the avante garde playwright still seems determined to put his esoteric and convoluted play on. Is there more at stake here though?
The year is 1972 and Dr Sandy Bakersfield has put together an expedition to a remote Indonesian island to look into rumours of strange beasts and verdant growth. Backed by the shadowy Geneveive Dindroff-Menscher of Arkham, and with Dr Nuess, Dr Minkie, and the slightly nervous Dr Salchesse they are heading into the wild unknown with 3 interns and Irfan Rhampattang their Malay guide.
It should just be a case of getting dropped off and collecting samples.
At Least that’s what Bakersfield has told them, glossing over the stories of Ghosts and Headhunters!
Having finally remembered what it was they were supposed to be doing, the Coeterie decide to surveil the issue. It turns out that the gang is much more difficult to deal with now, and definitely count as “issues we should have dealt with”. Now they have to turn to their allies in the hopes that they can help…
It all started with a for sale sign where there was no for sale sign before. This spells potential disaster for the Neonates, but who is behind it, and can they find some way of escaping from the clutches of late stage capitalism!
The Conclusion of Brendan’s date goes “well” by the previous standard, but then it is followed up by the Revelations that the Neonates may have been played for fools. This will no doubt end well.
First the Neonates watch a very questionable “voodoo” ritual hosted by the Blessed Aesina, but what exactly is going on they don’t really know. Then Brendan goes on a date, with disastorous consequences.
This episode was delayed by the editing laptop deciding to become a brick for a bit! However we are now back with this the first session of the second chapter of the Vampire the Masquerade 20th anniversary campaign!
The neonates are now much less new, and this brings with it issues as there are always going to be people wanting to take advantage of them. Which is exacty what is going to happen to them.
The fight against Talithar warms up as they try to surround her and she responds by trying to seize hold of people’s brains and make them do what she wants. Can the Coeterie defeat her, and more importantly… What happens if they do?
Click Here for the Heart: The City Beneath Kickstarter
Join us as we delve into the parasitic nightmare realm of the Heart as our band of ne’er-do-wells, penitents, and people with magical diseases try to save their home from becoming their very watery grave. The Kickstarter for this Game is currently live, so go back it, and let them know we sent you!
There is a sound effects version for those of you unlike me with no hearing issues!
Click Here for the Heart: The City Beneath Kickstarter
Join us as we delve into the parasitic nightmare realm of the Heart as our band of ne’er-do-wells, penitents, and people with magical diseases try to save their home from becoming their very watery grave. The Kickstarter for this Game is currently live, so go back it, and let them know we sent you!
This is the Sound effects version, there will be a no effects version for people like me with hearing issues!
First Off we sadly had a ton of planes going overhead, and the worlds loudest pigeon! Sorry I did try and cut them out where I could!
So they have a plan for dealing with Talithar now, watch her probable route into their domain and drop on her the moment they see her. The fact these plans involve standing around in other vampires domains is neither here nor there.
Also have they really thought through the “look like the sort of people she eats” part of the plan? Continue reading →
Talithar might be coming back, and the coeterie need to be ready for it. However there also seems to be someone spying on them and in these precarious times, that is a definite danger. Obviously they will begin planning the sting on Talithar and come up with an intelligent and safe plan for dealing with the spying. Of course they will. Totally.
It has become obvious that something is going on and they may need to gather some more information. The Neonates need to get hold of the Woodley coeterie, or what is left of it any how. Will they be able to find tem by wandering the rack? If they do will they be able to get the help that they need?
The dead body is dealt with but they still have to work out how it got there. Cue a lot of research, looking for information, and talking to cats. Did I say talking to cats? Yes I did, look it’s weird being a Vampire OK!
Will they be any closer to solving the question of who is out to get them?
Waking up next to dead bodies is not actually a normal thing for vampires, but if it had to happen to anyone it would happen to Edgar. Will the neonates be able to hide the evidence in time, will they be able to work out what is going on? Will they annoy anyone powerful.
Will they continue to to act like the what we do in the shadows lot?
In this Spoiler filled episode we look back on the entire campaign! Remembering the highs and lows, the losses and the triumphs, and every bloody time the players decided to do tourism rather than the plot!
Finally back in London the investigators have to find the scroll of the left hand and perform the ritual so that they do not melt into barely sentient cannibalistic ooze. Pretty much your normal Monday for a Cthulhu Investigator really. Can they do it? After so many months and so much death, can they finally be rid of the dread curse of the Sedefkar Simulacrum?
Having killed Makryat you’d think the Investigators would have time to relax… but no! The Duke De Essentes has come looking for his due. Will they hand over the Sedefkar to the madman who hospitalised Sadie, or will Selena’s barely controlled rage erupt and damn them all?
They cannot afford to waste time with the corruption continuing, but can they beat the Jigsaw Prince?
The Jigsaw Prince is offering them his help to get rid of Mehmet Makryat, but the Investigators just can’t help but think he’s just going to be as bad once they have done what he asks. Given their dire situation though do they really have a choice?
Will Errol manage to Impress the aim of his Man-crush Ramahotet? Will they find out who is Makryat? Join us now to find out!
Being two people down, the Investigators feel like they might be on the edge of failure. Could these two new people that have suddenly turned up be a life line? Or a trap.
Add to this the fact that the Train seems to have grown an extra… Cathedral… things might be about to get a bit more complex.
Episode 252
So the chief cultist being dead didn’t seem to work as now there are five cultists performing some kind of ritual with the train which is making it faster. Faster and possibly more evil. The Investigators have made their way to the front of the train without being spotted and even managed to persuade some Train Minions to go along with them!
Will their Ambush work? Given they are all so low on health and sanity will they even survive.
Episode 251
With Margrave dead surely the investigators can rest easier now? No no of course they can’t. First there is the problem of the evidence, then there is getting Elena Constanza back up the train safely.
On top of all of that they finally realise that there are also the 5 cultists who came on board with Margrave. They have been quiet so far but what trouble could they be up to?
Episode 248
With Lord Margrave heading down the train presumably to deal with Elena Constanza in a permanent manner, the Investigators swing into action to attempt to save her. However with the train in the station there are a lot of people getting on there is a high chance that some of them are not what they seem.
Can the Investigators manage to save their ally without dying themselves? Can they even get down the train?
Episode 247
Something is bothering Ludovic and the investigators worry that it might be something to do with them, so they decide to find out exactly what it is. The only problem is that it may cause them more problems than they expected.
However they also have to try and keep track of Margrave, Harrow-Bart and the others who might be Makryat. Is it a lost cause, or can Elena Constansa give them the clues that they need?
Episode 246
Tired of being passive (and with GM prodding) the Investigators realise that sitting and waiting to be stabbed is not a great plan and instead start to work out who is actually Makryat now. First step is to try and work out where the Sedefkar Simulacrum is with a trip to the Fourgon.
Will they find it? Will they discover Makryat’s identity? What is wrong with Errol’s Crate? Find out now.
It’s Christmas Eve and at Holiday park while they aren’t ready to open for christmas, they are going to run a full test of the park and make sure everything is working as intended. Which it might be, but just as likely it might not be…
Join us for a Feast Of Festive Fun and Horror in it’s beginning to look a lot like Krampus.
Also Happy Christmas, Yule, or whatever you prefer, and a happy new Year from us over here at the Cult!
Episode 240
The Investigation into the Death of the Yokozuna continues as they investigation team complete their interviews with the eyewitnesses and realise that they need to go and check out the Aokigohara Heya where he used to train.
Will the rumours of the cursed forest come true, or will they get to the bottom of the mystery.
Episode 239
Finding themselves under attack from tiny flesh starfish that are trying to choke them to death the Investigators must try and fight them off without doing themselves any more damage, as they are already very badly damaged. Chester is now very close to losing his mind, one more shock could push him over the edge into full insanity.
Will anyone still be left alive in the morning or will Makryat be ascendant?
Episode 238
The Investigators are still on their trip back to London, but somewhere on the train Mehmet Makryat is still trying to have them killed. They seem to be no closer to working out who he is currently disguised as, and the corruption is still continuing. Worse, as they pass through Europe they are passing close to enemies they previously escaped.
Episode 237
With the only witness a blackened charred corpse the Strike team decide to go to the Elagabalium and see the rites to Elgabol first hand. They hope that it will provide them with the clues they need to bring the Emperor down or at least reverse their decision to ban the worship of the Gods of Rome.
Will they be able to get in without being seen, and worse, if they do can they resist the call of the strange Syrian God themselves!
So join us now as we head to Rome 221 AD to find out if the Rites to Elagabol were finally ended.
Episode 236
Once again down a player for Horror on the Orient Express Mawdrigen had a few hours to come up with a game, and with the excellent History of Rome Podcast by Mike Duncan playing and remembering an interview Oscar Rios gave the excellent Good Friends Of Jackson Elias podcast an idea leaped into his head.
So join us now as we head to Rome 221 AD in the rule of the unconventional Emperor Elagabalus and the dangerous times that surrounded them.
Episode 235
Stepping off the train to send a telegram shouldn’t be a high stakes action but then most people aren’t under attack by a murderous band of Cultists.
The telegram sent however, getting back onto the train proves to be rather more problematic than expected!
Episode 234
As we were down an Archive we decided to run a little Cthulhu Dark this time, although we did have a slightly creaky chair issue as you will hear.
Follow us as we step into the 1890’s where Japan is on the cusp of becoming a great power as the Meiji restoration continues and the Army moves into Manchuria. However this is a particularly risky time for diplomacy so the last thing the Imperial Palace wants is for a demonstration of Sumo for the various ambassadors to result in an unusual incident.
Our unfortunate characters are tipped to “fix” the problem, or if not that, at least find someone to pin it on.
Episode 233
Sykeara might have distracted most of the zombies with her Robin Reliant and Shakespeare but the gamers still need to escape from Reading. Is a trip to the Police station something they should be contemplating or is it likely to result in yet more death!
Wiill they escape reading, or will the Beefy Beef Beefburgers ( the beefburgers with beef) zombies devour them all?
Finally Mawdrigen reveals his Zombie escape plan! (or does he? he edits these after all…) Continue reading →
Episode 232
The Gamers are still trying to escape the Zombie apocalypse which has been caused by infected beef from zombie cows. They have decided on escaping via car (not barge!) but the question is where will the car come from? Given they have just about managed to sneak down a single street this might prove a bit more difficult than they were bargaining for.
It may still be necessary to go down by the canal however, but if they do… what will they find!
Episode 231
Having survived (barely) the stabbing the investigators sit down for a hearty meal to replenish their blood supplies and to discuss what is happening. What could go wrong with a nice relaxing meal.
Oh yes, that’s what got them in trouble before!
Add to this the sight of something falling from the train and it is very much a case of business as usual. Continue reading →
Episode 230
Its Game Night and the Cult has descended on Mawdrigen’s house for an evening of gaming. Instead they find the door open with a message telling them to come inside. With a lack of Tea available however they all fall asleep, and what would you know, when they wake up there’s a zombie apocalypse on the go.
So they need to get out of town.
Will they try and escape by barge again? Of Course they will!
Episode 229
Having barely survived the poisoning attempts on their lives, and feeling the effects of the Simulacrum’s corruption the Investigators are hoping for a nice quiet day. The luxury of the Orient Express however lures them into a false sense of security, as an on-train constitutional goes horribly wrong!
Episode 228
Audio Note: We had an extra person so we had to get out an extra chair and it seems like that wasn’t one of the silenced ones. I’ve taken as much of the creaking as I could out!
Final Girl again, as this time we look in on the New Zealand backed McNeil base down on Antarctica. With surfer girls, gun obsessed security guys, and a guy who thinks penguins are “kinda sexy if you look at them right”. If this wasn’t bad enough it seems like the nearby US research station has just exploded, sure do hope than no THING happened to it.
Please let us know what you think either here, at thecultofteaanddice@gmail.com, or @Cultteaanddice if you want to give us any Feedback, please also feel free to leave us reviews on Itunes
The Music is Lost Harvest by by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License License
This Podcast is Explicit and contains Archive, Body Horror, death, horror, absorption, pervert radio operators, penguins, cold, fear, slime, and some very unpleasant sound effects.
Episode 227
Our beleaguered investigators have made it onto the train back to London, but somewhere aboard is both Mehmet Makryat and the Sedefkar Simulacrum. Worse given the abilities of the Simulacrum they have little to know idea who on the train Makryat now is. Could it be the Italian Opera singer determined to learn Chesters voice? Or perhaps the randy explorer trying to force his way into the ladies room. Who knows?
Worse Makryat knows exactly who they are and it is only a matter of time before he strikes, if the degeneration doesn’t kill them first.
Episode 226
First off, we still had freezer blocks, I’ve tried to reduce the squelching.
The Inquisitorial team have captured one assailant but it seems that the attempted train hijacking must have had more people on the job. Can paperwork reveal what is going on, or possibly imtimidation with shotguns. Can the Agents get to the bottom of the mystery.
Episode 225
Having taken out their guards, the Investigators find themselves at the top of the Minaret of the Shunned Mosque with almost all of the Brothers of the Skin and their escape. Now they need to escape and get to the train before Mehmet Makryat manages to escape with the Sedefkar Simulacrum.
With their sanity shaken to its very core can they even make it out of the mosque without losing their mind.
Episode 224
First off, we tried a different way of keeping cool when recording as we realised a fan would be way too loud. Sadly it turns out the Freezer blocks were very loud so there are a few crinkling plastic sounds and fluidic squelchings. I have tried to remove them as much as possible but some still remain as people were talking.
Onto the Game! Join us as we play Dark Heresy 1st Edition and we join our characters as they do that most mundane of things, catching a train. However this is the Dark Future of the Imperium so obviously heresy is lurking all around, but these people are servants of the Inquisition so if anything does raise its head they can shoot it off.
Episode 223
Down a couple of people due to holidays the Cult decided to revisit an old favourite, and try out Final Girl again. However in our quest to be ever more British, we decided to think about things that actually scarred us when we watched them… So we decided to do our own version of the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Animals_of_Farthing_Wood because it was truly chilling.
So join us now as cute fluffy animals (and a psychopathic pigeon) are horribly murdered in a variety of shocking ways. Continue reading →
The Cult of Tea and Dice, where British reviewers drink tea, play RPG’s, and assault your earholes with our opinions on things related to gaming and the sweet nectar of life that is Tea