Episode 257
Having killed Makryat you’d think the Investigators would have time to relax… but no! The Duke De Essentes has come looking for his due. Will they hand over the Sedefkar to the madman who hospitalised Sadie, or will Selena’s barely controlled rage erupt and damn them all?
They cannot afford to waste time with the corruption continuing, but can they beat the Jigsaw Prince?
Episode 255
The Jigsaw Prince is offering them his help to get rid of Mehmet Makryat, but the Investigators just can’t help but think he’s just going to be as bad once they have done what he asks. Given their dire situation though do they really have a choice?
Will Errol manage to Impress the aim of his Man-crush Ramahotet? Will they find out who is Makryat? Join us now to find out!
Episode 254
Being two people down, the Investigators feel like they might be on the edge of failure. Could these two new people that have suddenly turned up be a life line? Or a trap.
Add to this the fact that the Train seems to have grown an extra… Cathedral… things might be about to get a bit more complex.
Episode 252
So the chief cultist being dead didn’t seem to work as now there are five cultists performing some kind of ritual with the train which is making it faster. Faster and possibly more evil. The Investigators have made their way to the front of the train without being spotted and even managed to persuade some Train Minions to go along with them!
Will their Ambush work? Given they are all so low on health and sanity will they even survive.
Episode 251
With Margrave dead surely the investigators can rest easier now? No no of course they can’t. First there is the problem of the evidence, then there is getting Elena Constanza back up the train safely.
On top of all of that they finally realise that there are also the 5 cultists who came on board with Margrave. They have been quiet so far but what trouble could they be up to?
Episode 248
With Lord Margrave heading down the train presumably to deal with Elena Constanza in a permanent manner, the Investigators swing into action to attempt to save her. However with the train in the station there are a lot of people getting on there is a high chance that some of them are not what they seem.
Can the Investigators manage to save their ally without dying themselves? Can they even get down the train?
Episode 247
Something is bothering Ludovic and the investigators worry that it might be something to do with them, so they decide to find out exactly what it is. The only problem is that it may cause them more problems than they expected.
However they also have to try and keep track of Margrave, Harrow-Bart and the others who might be Makryat. Is it a lost cause, or can Elena Constansa give them the clues that they need?
Episode 246
Tired of being passive (and with GM prodding) the Investigators realise that sitting and waiting to be stabbed is not a great plan and instead start to work out who is actually Makryat now. First step is to try and work out where the Sedefkar Simulacrum is with a trip to the Fourgon.
Will they find it? Will they discover Makryat’s identity? What is wrong with Errol’s Crate? Find out now.
It’s Christmas Eve and at Holiday park while they aren’t ready to open for christmas, they are going to run a full test of the park and make sure everything is working as intended. Which it might be, but just as likely it might not be…
Join us for a Feast Of Festive Fun and Horror in it’s beginning to look a lot like Krampus.
Also Happy Christmas, Yule, or whatever you prefer, and a happy new Year from us over here at the Cult!
Episode 240
The Investigation into the Death of the Yokozuna continues as they investigation team complete their interviews with the eyewitnesses and realise that they need to go and check out the Aokigohara Heya where he used to train.
Will the rumours of the cursed forest come true, or will they get to the bottom of the mystery.
Episode 239
Finding themselves under attack from tiny flesh starfish that are trying to choke them to death the Investigators must try and fight them off without doing themselves any more damage, as they are already very badly damaged. Chester is now very close to losing his mind, one more shock could push him over the edge into full insanity.
Will anyone still be left alive in the morning or will Makryat be ascendant?
Episode 238
The Investigators are still on their trip back to London, but somewhere on the train Mehmet Makryat is still trying to have them killed. They seem to be no closer to working out who he is currently disguised as, and the corruption is still continuing. Worse, as they pass through Europe they are passing close to enemies they previously escaped.
Can they survive.
Episode 237
With the only witness a blackened charred corpse the Strike team decide to go to the Elagabalium and see the rites to Elgabol first hand. They hope that it will provide them with the clues they need to bring the Emperor down or at least reverse their decision to ban the worship of the Gods of Rome.
Will they be able to get in without being seen, and worse, if they do can they resist the call of the strange Syrian God themselves!
So join us now as we head to Rome 221 AD to find out if the Rites to Elagabol were finally ended.
Episode 236
Once again down a player for Horror on the Orient Express Mawdrigen had a few hours to come up with a game, and with the excellent History of Rome Podcast by Mike Duncan playing and remembering an interview Oscar Rios gave the excellent Good Friends Of Jackson Elias podcast an idea leaped into his head.
So join us now as we head to Rome 221 AD in the rule of the unconventional Emperor Elagabalus and the dangerous times that surrounded them.
Episode 235
Stepping off the train to send a telegram shouldn’t be a high stakes action but then most people aren’t under attack by a murderous band of Cultists.
The telegram sent however, getting back onto the train proves to be rather more problematic than expected!
Episode 234
As we were down an Archive we decided to run a little Cthulhu Dark this time, although we did have a slightly creaky chair issue as you will hear.
Follow us as we step into the 1890’s where Japan is on the cusp of becoming a great power as the Meiji restoration continues and the Army moves into Manchuria. However this is a particularly risky time for diplomacy so the last thing the Imperial Palace wants is for a demonstration of Sumo for the various ambassadors to result in an unusual incident.
Our unfortunate characters are tipped to “fix” the problem, or if not that, at least find someone to pin it on.
Wherein Mawdrigen tells you about a lovely kickstarter you might want to support if you have contrary players like his!
Check out 3 New Sidequest Decks: After the TPK; Modern; & Lovecraftian by Inkwell Ideas on @Kickstarter Kickstarter
Episode 233
Sykeara might have distracted most of the zombies with her Robin Reliant and Shakespeare but the gamers still need to escape from Reading. Is a trip to the Police station something they should be contemplating or is it likely to result in yet more death!
Wiill they escape reading, or will the Beefy Beef Beefburgers ( the beefburgers with beef) zombies devour them all?
Finally Mawdrigen reveals his Zombie escape plan! (or does he? he edits these after all…)
Continue reading
Episode 232
The Gamers are still trying to escape the Zombie apocalypse which has been caused by infected beef from zombie cows. They have decided on escaping via car (not barge!) but the question is where will the car come from? Given they have just about managed to sneak down a single street this might prove a bit more difficult than they were bargaining for.
It may still be necessary to go down by the canal however, but if they do… what will they find!
Episode 231
Having survived (barely) the stabbing the investigators sit down for a hearty meal to replenish their blood supplies and to discuss what is happening. What could go wrong with a nice relaxing meal.
Oh yes, that’s what got them in trouble before!
Add to this the sight of something falling from the train and it is very much a case of business as usual.
Continue reading
Episode 230
Its Game Night and the Cult has descended on Mawdrigen’s house for an evening of gaming. Instead they find the door open with a message telling them to come inside. With a lack of Tea available however they all fall asleep, and what would you know, when they wake up there’s a zombie apocalypse on the go.
So they need to get out of town.
Will they try and escape by barge again? Of Course they will!
Episode 229
Having barely survived the poisoning attempts on their lives, and feeling the effects of the Simulacrum’s corruption the Investigators are hoping for a nice quiet day. The luxury of the Orient Express however lures them into a false sense of security, as an on-train constitutional goes horribly wrong!
Join us now as they see how they get out of this!
Episode 228
Audio Note: We had an extra person so we had to get out an extra chair and it seems like that wasn’t one of the silenced ones. I’ve taken as much of the creaking as I could out!
Final Girl again, as this time we look in on the New Zealand backed McNeil base down on Antarctica. With surfer girls, gun obsessed security guys, and a guy who thinks penguins are “kinda sexy if you look at them right”. If this wasn’t bad enough it seems like the nearby US research station has just exploded, sure do hope than no THING happened to it.
See what I did there?
Come with us now and see
Please let us know what you think either here, at thecultofteaanddice@gmail.com, or @Cultteaanddice if you want to give us any Feedback, please also feel free to leave us reviews on Itunes
The Music is Lost Harvest by by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
License
This Podcast is Explicit and contains Archive, Body Horror, death, horror, absorption, pervert radio operators, penguins, cold, fear, slime, and some very unpleasant sound effects.
Episode 227
Our beleaguered investigators have made it onto the train back to London, but somewhere aboard is both Mehmet Makryat and the Sedefkar Simulacrum. Worse given the abilities of the Simulacrum they have little to know idea who on the train Makryat now is. Could it be the Italian Opera singer determined to learn Chesters voice? Or perhaps the randy explorer trying to force his way into the ladies room. Who knows?
Worse Makryat knows exactly who they are and it is only a matter of time before he strikes, if the degeneration doesn’t kill them first.
Episode 226
First off, we still had freezer blocks, I’ve tried to reduce the squelching.
The Inquisitorial team have captured one assailant but it seems that the attempted train hijacking must have had more people on the job. Can paperwork reveal what is going on, or possibly imtimidation with shotguns. Can the Agents get to the bottom of the mystery.
Also, why is that crate coughing?
Continue reading
Episode 225
Having taken out their guards, the Investigators find themselves at the top of the Minaret of the Shunned Mosque with almost all of the Brothers of the Skin and their escape. Now they need to escape and get to the train before Mehmet Makryat manages to escape with the Sedefkar Simulacrum.
With their sanity shaken to its very core can they even make it out of the mosque without losing their mind.
Episode 224
First off, we tried a different way of keeping cool when recording as we realised a fan would be way too loud. Sadly it turns out the Freezer blocks were very loud so there are a few crinkling plastic sounds and fluidic squelchings. I have tried to remove them as much as possible but some still remain as people were talking.
Onto the Game! Join us as we play Dark Heresy 1st Edition and we join our characters as they do that most mundane of things, catching a train. However this is the Dark Future of the Imperium so obviously heresy is lurking all around, but these people are servants of the Inquisition so if anything does raise its head they can shoot it off.
Hopefully.
Continue reading
Episode 223
Down a couple of people due to holidays the Cult decided to revisit an old favourite, and try out Final Girl again. However in our quest to be ever more British, we decided to think about things that actually scarred us when we watched them… So we decided to do our own version of the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Animals_of_Farthing_Wood because it was truly chilling.
So join us now as cute fluffy animals (and a psychopathic pigeon) are horribly murdered in a variety of shocking ways.
Continue reading
Episode 221
With Aktar having led them directly to the Shunned Mosque the Investigators realise like the odds are very against them. Undaunted they decide to try anyway, after all the very fate of the world is hanging in the balance.
What could possibly go wrong. Well it could all revolve around Errol and his general level of competence. Or it could even be a stealth mission where everyone has brought a large gun apart from Chester.
Can Aktar lead them to victory, or are there other dark forces at play that will bring them all to ruin?
Episode 219
Trapped in a graveyard by a bunch of cultists the Investigators are in the worst situation they have yet found themselves. The cult knows where the Simulacrum is, but have a terrible fate planned for our heroes.
However the cultists haven’t realised that the rope they used to tie our heroes may not be the best.
Can the investigators escape, or will this be the end of them?
Find out now.
Episode 216
Having found out that the Scrolls of the Sedefkar Simulacrum were not in the Topkapi Palace seemingly having been donated by Garaznet and then seemingly stolen by Selim Makryat.
Lost and confused they decide to engage in some Grave Rubbing in the hopes that Garaznet’s grave can give them some clues. With the back up plan of changing the vowel and engaging in Grave Robbing.
Of course this depends on if their Dice stop trying to kill them!
Episode 214
Finally at the end of the track the Investigators have to find out where the Scrolls may have gotten to, and also locate the Shunned Mosque. With their bodies slowly falling apart under the Baleful Influence of the simulacrum there is no time to lose.
So they go to the Library.
Episode 212
Heading towards Constantinople the Investigators start to plan exactly what it is they need to do as they approach the literal end of the line. However, they are also stepping right into the belly of the beast as the Cult of the Skinless One must surely run rampant in the city.
Will they be left to research in peace. Or will an early grave in the Bosphorus come to call.
Episode 211
Firstly Mawdrigen and Sheba went to Georgia (the country not the state) and came back with tea that we reviewed.
But that is just a momentary distraction from the death and destruction that happens next. Trapped on the train with an angry Vampire willing to kill who knows how many people to secure the Sedefkar Simulacrum the Investigators are backed into a corner like never before. The horrors they have seen are eroding their sanity and their will.
Can they survive, can they rid themselves of the Vampire, and can they live with what they may have to do to triumph?
Episode 210
Chai Masala from Tea India is reviewed and Mawdrigen quite likes it (which is good as it is Sheba’s favourite).
The Investigators have finally got the whole of the Sedefkar Simulacrum, and although it is making them feel awful if they can just get to Constantinople and find the Scrolls of Sedefkar they may be able to destroy it. So they settle in for a nice relaxing time on the Orient Express.
Yeah
Right.
There is something on the train with them, and it seems to be interested with their cargo.
Episode 209
WE ARE MUCH LOUDER IN THIS ONE! The chairs are still loud however which is annoying!
Firstly we go through our Itunes Reviews and give thanks to the lovely people who sent them to us! We also discuss pulling off CoC well around the table (Call of Cthulhu!)
We review a tea that Sheba ordered from Tea India (https://www.teaindia.co.uk/) which we thoroughly enjoyed!
Then into the adventure, the players have gone to try and finally deal with the Butchers in their hide out. However reaching there it seems as if someone else may have gotten to them first.
What lurks beneath in the darkness. Will they find the head of the Sedefkar Simulacrum, and if they do, will they be able to escape with it?
Episode 208
Trigger Warning – Bluebeards Bride is in essence a game dealing with the traumas of womanhood in a Patriachical world, themes of abuse, violence against women, and horror abound.
Welcome to the Finale of Bluebeards bride!
Join us again as the Bride continues her exploration of Buebeard’s mansion setting hateful creatures against each other. She explores wind blow balconies, attics and worse places all the while trying to work out the most important question.
Does she trust her new Husband?
Episode 207
WE ARE MUCH LOUDER IN THIS ONE! However it was blowing a gale outside so there might be some background noise!
With the incident at the Univerity over, the Major whisks them away to the tender mercies of his secret hideout and Dr Tredo. However while they are planning what to do about the Butchers, Selena has a visitor from London.
A Visitor with a Raven, oily hair, and a penchant for Occultism.
What could possibly go wrong.
The Major has a plan, but can he persuade them to go along with it!
Episode 206
Trigger Warning – Bluebeards Bride is in essence a game dealing with the traumas of womanhood in a Patriachical world, themes of abuse, violence against women, and horror abound.
Additional: We had two new Electronic people for this one (well one new to the podcast : Tulip and one new to being Electronic : Vonn) as such the sound is not quite as clean as I would have liked.
Joing us now as we follow the Bride, exploring the strange castle she now finds herself in command of. Who is her new husband Bluebeard, how has he amassed his riches, and why is the small cupboard at the end of the hall off limits?
Episode 205
WE ARE MUCH LOUDER IN THIS ONE!
Also Trigger warnings for Acid and neck trauma.
Having fought off the murderous hands that were busy trying to kill them or steal their eyes, they head to Dr Todorovic’s house to try and find the monograph on the Dhudzheta Idol.
Which reveals a great number of concerning issues, notably that it’s holders have a tendency to suffer with terrible head issues, and then go insane. You know “wearing their friends skins” Insane.
However the more pressing issue is where is the idol know, and who else could know about its where abouts!
Episode 203
EYE AND HAND TRAUMA TRIGGER WARNING
Having had a difficult time on the train and met the stern looking Major the Investigators get to Sofia, and with a promise from Dr Jordanov to help with locating the Dhudzheta Idol and the monograph referring to it the next day they settle into their hotel.
They also decide to stay in the Second Best Suite in the city. Will that decision lead to a beautiful restful sleep… Most likely not.
Episode 202
Firstly we try a disappointing tea.
Then to the adventure, wherein they meet a Professor on the Train who may also be investigating the Sedefkar Simulacrum. This being very concerning they decide to check on him, but in doing so draw themselves into even more trouble as their conversation is interrupted.
Will Dr Roberts regret coming to join them? Will they survive, and who is this strange serious Major?
Episode 201
We start with… well everyone had a really bad day so while there was no tea to review there was Cider (hard cider for the Americans).
Then we deal with the denouement of the Dreamlands Express. With Karkarov’s guilty consience still haunting them all they have realised that the Sorceror is actually intending to make one last attempt to wrest the Lovers Heart from Madame Brujah.
Have the dreamers gathered enough allies that they can fight him and his elephantine beasts off? Will Henri survive the destruction that will be wrought on the train. Will the dreamers be able to rid themselves of the items they have now mostly managed to create.
Episode 199
Finally done with Belgrade and back on the Orient Express, everyone sank into a lovely relaxing sleep. Of course then many of them awoke in the Dreamlands leaving Serennian. Who is this new man Sadie is talking to? How is the meeting between Selina and her going to go?
More importantly will they be able to create their dream items so they can throw them into the gulf of Nodens and free themselves from whatever it is that they chose to lose.
Episode 198
Aldi tea is good tea.
Back to trying to escape from the Little Cabin in the Woods the Investigators find the trees are also dangerous. Can they run fast enough, or if not can they find a way to make the evil dangerous trees stop chasing them.
Can the investigators get back to the town through the woods without dying horrifically? Lets see.
Episode 196
They’ve headed into the woods, they’ve found Grandmothers Cabin now to see if they can actually persuade her to sell the arm of the Sedefkar simulacrum to them assuming she has it.
Of course, Grandmother isn’t here and instead they find themselves dealing with a young lady who seems to be her grand-daughter who is much more interested in cooking and tapestry.
It’s all very calm. It’s all very non-threatening.
Yeah. Right.
Episode 195
Selina is feeling sleepy as they finally reach the little village where they believe the next peice of the Sedefkar Simulacrum should be. Looking for the local priest Christian Philopovic they are glad to have left the Big Black Cockerel behind on the train so they can take full advantage of the locals hospitality.
They seem to have been invited to a large meal, another large meal, and then an ancient ritual. What is the significance of the ritual, what is the bone whistle for, and why does the priest’s wife look so well preserved?
Episode 193
Selina finally awakes and finds herself being held by the Serbian Police, and with no recollection of having comitted the crime they claim that she has perpetrated.
In her usual style she sets out to prove her innocence, mostly by browbeating the Inspector in charge of her case. Can she persuade them of her innocence, or at least get away with murder (again).
Once out will the rest of them be able to procure the paper work they need to transport the treasure and also to get it back from the museum!
Episode 191
Happy Christmas / Hollidays / Winter-een-mas / Yule / Saturnalia / Time we all get off work!
We are debuting some new sound hardware this episode so hopefully it all worked out ok! There may be some kinks to work out, but if we’re lucky this should result in better quality sound, at least for a start you can no longer hear the creaky chairs!
On to the Episode.
With Selina arrested for Issy’s murder and the Sedefkar Simulacrum impounded along with all of the things they took from Professor Moric’s dig site. This is obviously a bit of an issue for the Investigators. So they decide to go shopping while their guide Petar tries to get them a meeting with Dr Todorovic to get the items back.
Episode 190
Clarissa is in shock at the revelation she received from the Accounts of Tillius Corvus, what does it mean that this long dead Roman is the spitting image of Doctor Jesus her erstwhile protector.
Everything moves swiftly however, and it is not long before she and Chester find themselves embroiled in yet more trouble.
There is Peril stalking the train, and maybe a few of their past issues have come back to roost.